Tag Archives: A QUIRK’s Journal

A QUiRK’S JOURNAL: RESOLUTIONS, GOALS, WHATEVER – JUST GO BE GREAT!

IMG_0569Ah, New Year’s Eve – the time when half of the population is scrambling to find a party to attend and the other half is determined to make their list of promises for the impending year. Don’t lie – have you made your resolutions known yet?

Don’t be ashamed if you did; people try to mask their resolutions by calling them goals or aspirations since the word “resolution” has such a negative stigma this time of year. News flash, guys: it all means the same thing.

You need a to-do list for your life, whether you think so or not. Mapping out what you’re striving towards is never a bad thing and can be done in so many creative ways from lists to vision boards. Have fun with speaking your future into existence and don’t get hung up on what others choose to call it. At the end of the day, you’re trying to get your life together – and that’s commendable.

Be healthy, be happy, be prosperous in this new year. Most of all – be a better YOU. Enjoy guys, and I’ll see you on the other side!

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A QUiRK’S JOURNAL: SCARED MONEY DON’T MAKE MONEY

IMG_0564This week has been the week for my family and friends to utter the same phrase simultaneously:

“I need to get on my game and get like [Steph].”

If this isn’t pressure, I don’t know what is but I’m glad I can motivate people to get their lives in check…I guess. I never really realized how much people looked up to me until this week. I don’t see myself as a role model or anything like that – I just want what I want and happened to position myself to where it’s actually possible.

I made a huge jump into the right direction this past week and the moniker that comes to mind when I think about what I’ve done in these last three days is:

“Scared money don’t make money.”

At this point in my life, money isn’t the motive; working in a field where I care about every single facet of what’s happening is the motive and I’m on my way.

I don’t want to be arrogant and say “get like me” but if you’re looking to make your dreams come true, then always remember that scared money don’t make money.

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A QUiRK’S JOURNAL: WHAT DO YOU SAY TO TAKING CHANCES?

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I told you a while back I had to quit my job as a means of stepping into my destiny. Well, I didn’t; as a matter of fact, I accepted a raise which is the exact opposite of quitting.

I sat back and told myself, “since nothing’s coming your way in the field you want anyway, you can use the next six months to save up for your apartment then resume your quest to be all that you can be for those you want to be that for.”

Folks, don’t do this – it’s a trap.

I psyched myself out, willingly gave up on the path lain for me before I continued to take my second step toward it. The whole reason for me leaving Houston to come to NYC was to achieve great things, not make great money. To be quite honest, the money’s not even that great because I have to pay all these taxes back come January, but that’s another story for another time.

I’m guessing that God allowed me to accept this raise in exchange for my will to chase a dream and said, “um boo, just what ARE you doing? This ain’t it and you know it.” I’d stopped applying for jobs and everything, but one tweet (I love Twitter) had me scrambling to send my resume off just this once. I was curious to see if something would come of it.

A response wasn’t likely; my experience on paper is great for the position I have now but if I let that stop me I wouldn’t have had any many interviews as I’ve had since being up here. I’m a “cross your fingers and see what happens” kind of applicant – the worst they can do to you is not reply. That’s what I was expecting with this particular title.

I have an interview tomorrow afternoon instead.

This is the biggest interview I’ll have had since I started working at sixteen because it’s in the direct line of my talents and vision for myself. I’m nervous because I don’t want to screw up and I want them to say yes to me, but I only have control over what I do that will make this a success for me.

I have to be myself and sell my capabilities vocally, which is hard for me but I want this so I will prepare as much as I can so I won’t have to report back to this current job anymore.

Everything is riding on this, but even if I don’t get it (I’m a realist just as much as I am an optimist) I can be proud that I went after it and I won’t give up because I know it is possible. I’m trying not to jump ahead of myself and take this one step at a time.

Sixteen hours until the coin lands – I’m hoping for heads.

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A QUiRK’S JOURNAL: OPEN UP

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I classify myself as a selective mute: I don’t speak unless I feel compelled to by events happening around me or if I feel comfortable with whoever is near me. If we’re cool, you’ve gotten my goofy ratchet side – be thankful because I don’t bestow that unto everyone I come across.

Not everyone deserves it.

Still, as I get older I’m learning that opening up is vital to my growth as a person in every aspect: professionally, personally, emotionally and spiritually. I have to know that somebody out there feels me and I’m not going to get the chances I feel I deserve if I don’t give a little of my true self in everything I put into the universe.

I want to be a part of great things, things that my kids will look at and say, “Mama, you so damn dope though”, which in turn I’ll say, “thanks but you’re not cool enough to curse in front of me yet so pump your brakes.”

It’s going to come – with focus, determination and tunnel vision my dreams will come into fruition.

Step one: OPEN UP

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A QUiRK’S JOURNAL: WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? … HOW?!

hi! my mental is going through tons right now, hence my absence lately, but i need to get this off and work through it. the most effective way i can think of doing this is to write through it, so here is my first entry in my quirky journal. read up on my struggle, won’t you?

 

 

I ask myself all of this all the time:

who do I want to be?
what do I plan to do?
when is shit gonna pop?
where is said shit gonna take me once it pops?

The most important question I ask myself is HOW am I going to do all of the things I’ve just listed?

I promise that these are all genuine questions; I haven’t come upon the answers to these just yet. I feel like that’s happened because I haven’t been dedicating enough time to my craft in order for something amazing to happen for me.

It’s hard to give my writing the attention it deserves when I’m going to school and working at such a thankless job that takes up any kind of free time I may have. So what are my options?

I could drop school but I’ve been doing that since ’07 and despite my small gripes here and there, I actually enjoy being in school and want this damn degree once and for all. Scratch that, we’re staying in school.

I could kick this job to the curb, which wouldn’t hurt my feelings at all. Only problem is…I got bills, Gina! This city life is not cheap and I don’t even go out like the average social twentysomething. I like to eat – a lot. I need to eat out here, so completely eliminating a job is out of the question. I could scale back my schedule to allow my focus to be more evenly distributed. That sounds great but either way this current job has to go; it’s counterproductive for me and causes me way too much stress than it’s worth.

Continue reading

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