I told you a while back I had to quit my job as a means of stepping into my destiny. Well, I didn’t; as a matter of fact, I accepted a raise which is the exact opposite of quitting.
I sat back and told myself, “since nothing’s coming your way in the field you want anyway, you can use the next six months to save up for your apartment then resume your quest to be all that you can be for those you want to be that for.”
Folks, don’t do this – it’s a trap.
I psyched myself out, willingly gave up on the path lain for me before I continued to take my second step toward it. The whole reason for me leaving Houston to come to NYC was to achieve great things, not make great money. To be quite honest, the money’s not even that great because I have to pay all these taxes back come January, but that’s another story for another time.
I’m guessing that God allowed me to accept this raise in exchange for my will to chase a dream and said, “um boo, just what ARE you doing? This ain’t it and you know it.” I’d stopped applying for jobs and everything, but one tweet (I love Twitter) had me scrambling to send my resume off just this once. I was curious to see if something would come of it.
A response wasn’t likely; my experience on paper is great for the position I have now but if I let that stop me I wouldn’t have had any many interviews as I’ve had since being up here. I’m a “cross your fingers and see what happens” kind of applicant – the worst they can do to you is not reply. That’s what I was expecting with this particular title.
I have an interview tomorrow afternoon instead.
This is the biggest interview I’ll have had since I started working at sixteen because it’s in the direct line of my talents and vision for myself. I’m nervous because I don’t want to screw up and I want them to say yes to me, but I only have control over what I do that will make this a success for me.
I have to be myself and sell my capabilities vocally, which is hard for me but I want this so I will prepare as much as I can so I won’t have to report back to this current job anymore.
Everything is riding on this, but even if I don’t get it (I’m a realist just as much as I am an optimist) I can be proud that I went after it and I won’t give up because I know it is possible. I’m trying not to jump ahead of myself and take this one step at a time.
Sixteen hours until the coin lands – I’m hoping for heads.